tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15184661923882013002024-03-12T23:30:33.096-07:00Learning to Receive with Grace and EaseJoanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.comBlogger104125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-53866819348635334412012-12-09T10:00:00.000-08:002012-12-09T10:00:00.054-08:00Thanks to Wayne Dyer<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">“You are important enough to ask and you are blessed enough to
receive back.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Wayne Dyer <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">If you subscribe to <i>Science of Mind</i> magazine, you’ve probably seen that Wayne Dyer is
featured in the January 2013 issue. This
got me to reflecting on how much he has given to me over the years. I’d like to share of few of Dyer’s teachings
that continue to bless me, as he is a masterful receiver:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">“I never worry
about money. I know I can always make
more.” I heard him say this one time,
and one of my goals is to be able to say this with as much conviction as he
does. I’m making progress!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">“Don’t own that.” By “that” Dyer was referring to other
people’s issues, problems, gripes, and so forth. As a parent, it is especially
easy to own our children’s problems, although the older they get, the less
those problems are ours to fix. This
phrase might also be useful with spouses, co-workers, or anyone else who may
blame us for something unjustifiably.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">On a related note, Dyer once explained
that you can't control your reputation, because that’s determined by others. What
we can control is our character. So let’s
not own others’ opinions of us either.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Years ago Dyer pointed out that children
can do more than we usually give them credit for. His children did laundry at
the age of 8. What can you empower your
kids with this busy holiday season?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">“Being against anything weakens you,
while being for something empowers you. Be for peace not against war.” The first time I heard him speak on this, he
referenced Mother Teresa who said she would never participate in an antiwar
rally, but she would attend a pro-peace rally.
I wish more people had adopted this approach during this last election!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-8165531892310336792012-12-02T19:59:00.000-08:002012-12-02T19:59:46.909-08:00You Are Not What You Feel<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">As I pointed out a couple of weeks
ago, many spiritual teachers caution strongly about the ways we phrase things.
While I agree about avoiding limiting language, I do think the issue can be
taken too far. For instance, when it
comes to weight loss, some say we should “release” weight, not “lose” it, I
guess because we might find it again. Or
perhaps it’s because “loss” has such a negative connotation. After working for Weight Watchers for five
years, though, I’ve seen hundreds of people successfully lose weight, so I hold
no fear of the phrase.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">David Friedman makes a point about
wording that I think is well worth considering, however. He suggests that we should exchange “I am”
with “I feel” much of the time. As I
understand him, “I am” statements are best reserved for declarations of truth
about ourselves, describing characteristics that are immutable. Let’s say “<i>I am</i> a child of God” but “I feel hungry.” Or “<i>I am</i>
divinely blessed” although I may “feel” frustrated, disappointed, or angry. Saying we feel these things rather than we
are them acknowledges that they’re temporary situations, not a way of being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">When it comes to enhancing our ability
to receive, let’s keep the “I am” statements positive and know it’s okay to
acknowledge our feelings at that moment: I feel limited from time to time, but
in reality <i>I am</i> prospered when I remember
that “I have a rich Father who’s taking care of this,” (to borrow one of Charles
Fillmore’s most delightful affirmations).
I feel impatient, but <i>I am </i>on
the way to realizing the abundance I desire.
<i>I am</i> grateful, and <i>I am</i> capable of receiving all I need
with grace and ease. How about you?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-37603166446462039912012-11-25T20:02:00.001-08:002012-11-25T20:02:42.051-08:00Where Do You Stand on Tithing?<br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 0in;">Bring the full tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food
in my house. And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of hosts,
if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a
blessing until there is no more need.</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 0in;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Malachi 3:10<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Many churches encourage their members
to tithe, which traditionally means to give the first ten percent of your gross
earnings to the church or entity which feeds you spiritually. In the Judeo-Christian tradition, tithing was
the way the Hebrew people sustained the Levites who served as priests, rather
than as shepherds or other forms of laborers who earned wages. But is the practice relevant today? Is it necessary in order to receive?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I’ve heard many sermons on this topic,
from a variety of churches I’ve attended over the years. Although they always encourage it, most have
not gone so far as to say tithing is necessary to receive, while others have
suggested that it’s sufficient. Usually
the verse from Malachi shown above is referenced as evidence that it’s a sound
practice that will ultimately bless you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">From my personal experience and
observation, I’ve concluded that tithing is neither necessary nor sufficient in
order to receive. However, I have been a
faithful and joyful tither for over ten years and have no intention of
quitting. Tithing just makes sense to
me: ten percent to God, ninety percent to me.
How many professionals do you know of who take only a ten percent cut?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS","sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I don’t know who said it first, but
the expression “you can’t out-give God” rings true for me every time I hear
it. Although not everyone who tithes is
wealthy, I don’t know of anyone who went broke tithing either. While tithing may not be the only thing we
need to do to manifest prosperity, I think it’s a step in the right direction,
especially when money appears tight. For
me it’s a tangible indication that I’m putting my trust in the one true,
unlimited Source.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-83398206083093082972012-11-18T10:00:00.000-08:002012-11-18T10:00:02.635-08:00Watch Your Mouth -- Part Two<br />
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As you may have suspected from last
week’s article, the list of limiting phrases it would be good to avoid is
long. Here are a few more I’ve
encountered:<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]-->“The
other half” -- when people identify another “half” that they’re excluded from they’ve
found yet one more way to restrict their ability to receive. A small consolation I suppose is that they’re
not alone. If the Berlin Wall can come
down, so can any imagined dividing line between us and those who seem to have
more we do at the moment. There is no “us”
and “them”; we are one.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]-->“I
can’t” -- this pronouncement is usually code for “I won’t” or “I don’t want to.”
I remember a situation when for years a
certain administrator claimed he couldn’t possibly take Labor Day off due to
some scheduling requirements his employer had in place. He got promoted and the very first year his
replacement was in his former job she managed to take Labor Day off. The word “can’t” limits our options and
possible outcomes, so be particularly discerning with its use.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><!--[endif]-->“My little guardian angel” - I like to
visualize divine help for myself or others by calling forth our little guardian
angels to watch over us. I caught my
phrasing recently and decided to replace it with “my mighty guardian angel.” It makes sense when you think about it. What could be more powerful than Divine
assistance?<o:p></o:p></div>
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I
hope my lists have raised your awareness.
After all, the most read book in the world begins with, “In the beginning was the
word…”</div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-64060224261367815072012-11-11T10:00:00.000-08:002012-11-11T10:00:04.955-08:00Watch Your Mouth<br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Am
I bringing back memories? Did you have
an elder who reminded you to “watch your mouth” if you said something out of
line? Today I suggest that you watch
your mouth in the sense of the expressions you use. I’ve caught myself or others using this
limiting language which in the end only short circuits our ability to receive:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">· <!--[endif]-->“Fixed
income” -- many retired folks love to remind others that their ability to spend
(give) is limited because their income is fixed. While they may feel some sense of relief
that others won’t expect much from them, this declaration severely limits the
flow of good into their lives, since apparently they see the government, their
former employer, or their IRA as their source. Roger has told me stories of how
over the years he watched in amazement as his aging mother received income from
the most unexpected places, just when she needed it. Looks like she knew who her Source was!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">· <!--[endif]-->“I’m
just a poor [whatever] -- this is the working person’s corollary to the first
phrase. I heard a teacher state this
once to explain why he didn’t have a cell phone (at a time when every adult I
knew managed to have one). Decide right
now that you are not and never will be “poor” in any sense of the word. There, done!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">· <!--[endif]-->“Working
at” or “struggling with” - one of my wonderful ministers, <a href="http://www.dare2create.com/" target="_blank">Rev. Dr. MitziLynton</a>, observed for me how often I chose this phrasing. No wonder I was exhausted and frustrated at the
time!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Join me this week and let’s
listen carefully. It’s often easier to
catch what someone else says, so enlist someone close to you to listen to what
you say. Let me know what you hear, and
I’ll add them to my Watch Your Mouth list.</span>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-8732494430202981532012-11-04T10:00:00.000-08:002012-11-04T10:00:02.743-08:00Second Chances<br />
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Last week I wrote
about times when I was presented with opportunities to resolve situations that
troubled me. I said that I had decided
to wait and that soon chances to rectify these independent conditions were more
or less thrust upon me. What if I had
missed this divine timing? Would it have
been too late?</div>
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I don’t think
so. From what I have observed in my own
life, and from watching those close to me, if we don’t get the message the
first time, Spirit has an infinite number of ways of reaching us. And unlike us, Spirit never wearies or grows
inpatient. (Must have something to do
with existing in the realm of eternity!)
It occurs to me that, in fact, I may have already made a misstep by
waiting to act. Perhaps the reason my
encounters with these significant others were so unavoidable was because I had
overlooked my Source’s subtler messages earlier. It makes no difference. We always get a
second chance with Spirit.</div>
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I find this
realization comforting, not just for my own growth, but also when my attempts
to help others fail. If I was truly
called to assist someone and my efforts were unsuccessful for some reason, I
have no need for concern. It’s not all
up to me, no matter what I may think at the moment. Yes, life <i>is </i>easier when we’re receptive the
first time around. But if we’re still
learning to receive with grace and ease, we’ll get another chance.</div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-81985199004533758302012-10-28T10:00:00.000-07:002012-10-28T10:00:02.044-07:00The Gift of Perfect Timing<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYbTjZT2WWDKjtjGclCrvE2NEfXITS7WsibEMPogyjjLTVx7TSYKl0GPkzupykS2y0KGfNfUySEuW6-Bd6GGecB4FnuzW-5pGNRah9QYjDUsqYG-NYGSMc9Ap8mkWAJNO5Qsl6whiZlIg/s1600/CO+Scenery+320x240.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYbTjZT2WWDKjtjGclCrvE2NEfXITS7WsibEMPogyjjLTVx7TSYKl0GPkzupykS2y0KGfNfUySEuW6-Bd6GGecB4FnuzW-5pGNRah9QYjDUsqYG-NYGSMc9Ap8mkWAJNO5Qsl6whiZlIg/s1600/CO+Scenery+320x240.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As a woman of faith,
I may not know how to handle every situation, but I do always have a Source of
guidance and opportunity. Recently I’ve
experienced people behaving in ways that weren’t what I was expecting. These friends made choices that seemed out of
character for them and didn’t make me feel good. Thankfully I’ve reached a place in my own
development that enabled me to avoid reacting.
Instead, I privately acknowledged my feelings, consulted my Source of
guidance, and decided to hold off taking any action. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This week, as I was
moving through my usual routines and activities, I was given the opportunity to
connect with each of these individuals. By
opportunity I don’t mean we just happened to be at the same event - I mean I
would turn the corner and run smack into them!
In each instance my friend reached out to me. Maybe after two and a half years of weekly
writing about receiving, I’m finally getting it; maybe it was my guardian angel
nudging me. Whatever the cause, I didn’t
miss the moment. I accepted their warm
acknowledgement and the fence mending began.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
Receiving comes in many
forms and often in unexpected ways. To
enhance your ability to be more receptive, take quiet time every day, not just
for reflection, but to sit in the silence.
Give your Source a few minutes to be heard. The outcome may astound you!</span>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-55015736147150893022012-10-22T09:25:00.001-07:002012-10-22T09:25:32.630-07:00More Lessons from Space<br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I’m still thinking
about our trip to the Kennedy Space Center.
One thing that touched me was the comments made by many of the
astronauts stating that their space experience changed their perception of life
and our world. Being able to view the
earth from space was profoundly moving for them. They were struck with a sense of peace,
unity, and awe. Wouldn’t it be amazing
if every inhabitant of the earth were able to have that view? Would competition and strife be as rampant, I
wonder? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">While I was fairly
familiar with the Apollo and Space Shuttle missions, I’m embarrassed to tell
you that much of the detail about the International Space Station was unknown
to me. In just a few days, on November
2, the ISS will have its 12th anniversary of continuous human occupation. In that time, there have been 125 launches to
the ISS and the space station has been visited by 204 individuals. According to NASA, “the ISS has been the most
politically complex space exploration program ever undertaken.” The ISS was created and is maintained through
the cooperative efforts of United States, Russia, Europe, Japan, and Canada. To further elaborate, the European nations
involved include Germany, France, Italy, Belgium, Switzerland, Spain, Denmark,
Netherlands, Norway, and Sweden, among others.
I am incredibly encouraged by the ongoing collaboration, cooperation and
achievement demonstrated by these nations.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It’s easy to get caught up
in the ubiquitous scarcity and limitation thinking and resulting conflict that
confront us daily. If we look, however,
we can find examples that contradict these perspectives. Next time you need a reminder that we really
all are one and there is plenty for all, just look up to the skies and whisper
a blessing to the inhabitants of the ISS.</span>
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]-->Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-6163060669713230242012-10-14T10:00:00.000-07:002012-10-14T10:00:00.865-07:00Nothing Is Impossible<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK404DyrLAD7rg7h8Lmo4UNQ96UbpcRydIB_BuDdVMPYoZNPQ3_pZKQ-zdBAmjpIsSdicgB9nTM789FvzL_klCaFAWg0TENTbupN6pD54MjqpGT-v0d6zLcW-aNkKgF19jS2jkxzmxKis/s1600/Bottom+of+Apollo+276x392.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK404DyrLAD7rg7h8Lmo4UNQ96UbpcRydIB_BuDdVMPYoZNPQ3_pZKQ-zdBAmjpIsSdicgB9nTM789FvzL_klCaFAWg0TENTbupN6pD54MjqpGT-v0d6zLcW-aNkKgF19jS2jkxzmxKis/s320/Bottom+of+Apollo+276x392.jpg" width="225" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you have a dream or goal that feels
too difficult or complex to achieve? Last
week I visited the Kennedy Space Center in Florida. I discovered that I had no idea what
complexity really meant!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Did you know that there were two
million systems on an Apollo spacecraft? Two million! How is it possible that mere mortals were
able to design and operate so many systems at one time? While I remember many of the launches (yes, I
was very young!), I had no appreciation for how many spacecraft went up within
months of each other. I now understand
that NASA had to be constructing several rockets at a time, adjusting the
designs in process, as scientists learned from each flight. In an interview of one of the astronauts who
had walked on the moon, he stated emphatically that we should consider nothing
as impossible. Seeing the spacecraft up
close and learning about how the various components worked, I have to
agree. It boggles my mind!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was also very impressed with the
intense training that went on and continues for all the space missions. Did you know that there is a full-sized model
of the International Space Station submerged under water that is used for
training purposes? How foolish we have
been to take the accomplishments of all those involved in the space program for
granted. Just as surgeons caution that
there is no routine operation, I now appreciate that there is no routine space
mission. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Even if
you can’t get to Florida, check the KSC out online, especially if you’re
holding a big dream. If we walked on the
moon in 1969, it’s pretty likely that your dream is possible, don’t you think?</span>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-90044115900320487012012-10-07T10:00:00.000-07:002012-10-07T10:00:04.846-07:00Default Thoughts<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjme3iLfmjNIHVMIMMKfDbQyV07cWOuykXYDvQio3YTcrPT56qjalkKgsOnxCcGmlxDsFAsdoaPlJSBKID42lXVqJ9UoEmqVEaXojtkL7vkVRXy0N8Rr_Q_iMAO4rBjfYFkBcp77Hhr5ak/s1600/Default+Thoughts+368x314.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="273" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjme3iLfmjNIHVMIMMKfDbQyV07cWOuykXYDvQio3YTcrPT56qjalkKgsOnxCcGmlxDsFAsdoaPlJSBKID42lXVqJ9UoEmqVEaXojtkL7vkVRXy0N8Rr_Q_iMAO4rBjfYFkBcp77Hhr5ak/s320/Default+Thoughts+368x314.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I've heard it said that most of us
think the same thoughts over and over again.
The problem is that often these are negative thoughts or memories that
serve no constructive purpose. If this
sounds familiar to you, here’s an exercise to try. Just as your computer has default settings,
create for yourself default thoughts that you can turn to as needed.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Construct a two-column chart, listing in
the left column the thoughts or memories you find yourself returning to that
you’d like to let go of. If it’s a negative
thought, identify the unpleasant memory behind it and write that down. For instance, “I’m such a klutz!” could be a
recurring thought you have based on the time you tripped walking into a crowded
room. So your list will be comprised of things
you or someone else did that continue to make you feel bad. Next to each item, in the right column write
down a specific example of something the individual did that was kind or positive. You might list “walked across the stage at
graduation with my head held high” across from the tripping incident. The right column will be your default
thoughts. Anytime you find yourself
drifting back to an unpleasant memory, immediately substitute your default
thought.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In reality, there are far more
positive incidents than negative, although it’s the nasty memories that seem to
linger. For instance, perhaps someone
you’re close to did something uncharacteristically unkind. For some reason you find yourself mulling the
incident over, replaying it as if eventually it will turn out differently. Because this is someone you care about, there
are likely to be many wonderful things this person has done for you. Chose one that you’re especially grateful for
as your default thought. Anytime you
find yourself drifting back to the unpleasant memory, immediately substitute
your default thought. Any feelings of
hurt or resentment will be replaced with gratitude and love. Not only will you feel better, you’ll put
yourself in a position to receive even more good.<o:p></o:p></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-4411362988801426332012-09-30T10:00:00.000-07:002012-09-30T10:00:01.366-07:00Are you Willing to be Uncomfortable?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhO6Eq-aSG05HvZvr_OJWv_I7__Gc8YgF7Baxh6dQRlUOoxAJtbkpKBkYTJSdcCPBHYUyUVs701WMzQ4LSmolql_yL7yObTlG3-39cLr_vwIcDaxUlIOOeNWFUDoX_8AjQSpKontEMDNYQ/s1600/Networking+311x325.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhO6Eq-aSG05HvZvr_OJWv_I7__Gc8YgF7Baxh6dQRlUOoxAJtbkpKBkYTJSdcCPBHYUyUVs701WMzQ4LSmolql_yL7yObTlG3-39cLr_vwIcDaxUlIOOeNWFUDoX_8AjQSpKontEMDNYQ/s320/Networking+311x325.jpg" width="306" /></a></div>
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I had a powerful ah-ha moment last
week. I discovered that successful
people aren’t necessarily the ones who work the hardest or are the best in
their fields. Yes, those things help,
but they’re not enough. Don’t you know
hard-working people who are really good at what they do, but are just barely
making ends meet? Successful people are
the ones who are willing to persist, even when they’re uncomfortable. Here’s what I experienced.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I was at a networking event with a
group of people I didn’t know. They knew
each other pretty well, though, or so it seemed, because everybody was in small
groups chatting away. I tried my best to
work the room, but two different conversations I’d struck up with people were
interrupted mid-sentence by another person breaking in. No “excuse me,” just a turning away to speak
with someone they knew while I stood there awkwardly. Other times I’d spot an individual I wanted
to approach but before I could make my way through the narrow, crowded space,
someone had beaten me to them. As my
confidence plummeted, I became very uncomfortable and seriously contemplated
leaving. I stood there for a few minutes
feeling the knot in my stomach and the tightness in my shoulders, scanning the
room for someone to talk to. Eventually
I found someone to connect with, who led me to another, and then to
another. Ultimately I met at least six
people I followed up with later, exceeding my expectations for the event.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The purpose of networking is to build
relationships that can be mutually beneficial.
If I had left when my discomfort mounted, I would never have met the
people I did. No one would be blessed by
my leaving. Because I was willing to
endure my discomfort, I had the opportunity to give and receive. One woman I spoke with had three points of
connection with me, and I’m sure we’ll see each other again soon. Receiving something you’ve never had before
will likely mean being in unfamiliar situations. Be willing to be uncomfortable and see what
you receive!<b><o:p></o:p></b></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-6704699127026366632012-09-23T10:00:00.000-07:002012-09-23T10:00:00.207-07:00What Does it Mean to be Generous?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpUaG2yUlENvldzLhI8gj3s0zCkqCHd1B3lshkYFMajx25_SaprpeSiBAk6M10yvz9VhqkFok1UDwUGAYlmpC8LmLi5L3m-aOJMp0XOBa9HFq49LT0QuUY_VkxiH2-_qY8W6CDbrgDrCU/s1600/Roger+with+kids+321x230.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpUaG2yUlENvldzLhI8gj3s0zCkqCHd1B3lshkYFMajx25_SaprpeSiBAk6M10yvz9VhqkFok1UDwUGAYlmpC8LmLi5L3m-aOJMp0XOBa9HFq49LT0QuUY_VkxiH2-_qY8W6CDbrgDrCU/s320/Roger+with+kids+321x230.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Many people desire abundance so that
they can be more generous in their giving.
I understand this kind of thinking. There are so many wonderful
non-profit organizations and candidates for election that I’d love to support
financially. Giving money is certainly
one way to be generous, but is it the only way or even the best way?<o:p></o:p></div>
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The dictionary offers several
definitions of the word “generous.” Two
are particularly relevant to the subject of receiving. One definition is “kind,” as in willing to
give money, assistance, or time freely. I
like the broadness of this description, as sharing our time and skills is often
more useful than money, such as providing respite services for a caregiver. I like to expand the definition even further
and include giving our attention as an act of generosity. Children and the elderly are especially
overlooked when they speak, and the simple act of really listening to them is a
wonderfully generous gift. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Being attentive relates to the other
dictionary definition of generous that is relevant here, and that is to be “noble,”
as in demonstrating forgiveness. Isn’t
it generous when someone overlooks a slight, gives us the benefit of the doubt,
or pardons our shortcomings? If we’re truly
attentive often we’ll recognize that the other person is doing their best. In reality, behaving with kindness and
responding with graciousness are two of the most powerful ways to be generous,
and they don’t cost a dime.<o:p></o:p></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-2828977533375405902012-09-16T10:00:00.000-07:002012-09-16T10:00:04.661-07:00Who’s in Control?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcowTfBw5HjR_vZbLf5DZ2W-brGwtBjkTofuZ5KRb60TqdWynYnIrH9hnmdkhiZ8LSsHz8XcwhQzzcJ-hUkQgyhTfWfw7Sy3_Bcoxuud71mpide32Uw_PaikoOAGbKGz7bJoMwv5V6-Ek/s1600/Woods+256x341.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcowTfBw5HjR_vZbLf5DZ2W-brGwtBjkTofuZ5KRb60TqdWynYnIrH9hnmdkhiZ8LSsHz8XcwhQzzcJ-hUkQgyhTfWfw7Sy3_Bcoxuud71mpide32Uw_PaikoOAGbKGz7bJoMwv5V6-Ek/s320/Woods+256x341.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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“You
can’t be surprised, you can’t be tickled if you try to control it.” Dr. Joseph
Dispenza<o:p></o:p></div>
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It seems to me that there is a debate
in the New Thought community about whose will we should be focused on. Does God have a plan for my life (the
traditional Christian view) or is it up to me to make the plan and God will say
“yes” (Edwene Gaines and Terry McBride teach this)? Unity appears to take a
middle of the road approach saying that we co-create our lives with God and should be specific in our prayer requests
but add “this or something better” at the end.
I must admit, after reflecting on this question for years, I’m still on
the fence.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Most of the time, though, I see it as a
bit of both - that God’s will and my will really are the same, although I may
not know it. For the most part, all any
of us really want is to be happy. (It’s
what will make us happy that we’re often unclear about.) I believe God wants us to be happy, too, so
we really do both want the same thing.
When it comes to receiving, I suspect we’ll do best when we dwell on the
feelings we want to have, such as happiness, rather than on the specifics of how
to accomplish those feelings. I’ll leave
you with this little poem I came upon years ago and still have memorized:<o:p></o:p></div>
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As a
child brings her broken toy with tears for us to mend,<o:p></o:p></div>
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I
brought my broken dream to God, because he was my friend.<o:p></o:p></div>
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But
soon I snatched it back and cried, “how can you be so slow?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“My
child,” He said, “what could I do? You
never did let go.”<o:p></o:p></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-44171889099367663672012-09-09T10:00:00.000-07:002012-09-09T10:00:05.085-07:00Skate Slowly and Carefully<br />
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This phrase came back to me recently: All
skate slowly and carefully. The
invitation would come booming over the loud speaker at the roller skating rink,
calling us all back onto the floor after a special skate had ended. This was a welcome request then, and I
realize it applies now when we’re striving to receive. Let’s all keep going, moving slowly and
carefully.<o:p></o:p></div>
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With 4G speed and instant access, we
have become an impatient society. It’s
easy to get frustrated when things don’t manifest as quickly as we need or
would like them to. We see no progress
and assume nothing is happening. Without
allowing time for the universe to work things out on our behalf, we abandon our
efforts and scramble to try a different approach. What we needed to do was “skate slowly and
carefully,” continuing our efforts despite appearances. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I remember giving this advice to my
Weight Watcher members when they would fail to lose weight. They would claim they’d hit the dreaded
weight-loss plateau because one week they didn’t lose weight. In the weight loss world, any period of
maintenance shorter than three weeks is just business as usual. A plateau is not called until they’d gone
three weeks without a loss. Thankfully,
with encouragement, most were able to keep “skating” and soon found they were
truly making progress toward their goal.
How about you?<o:p></o:p></div>
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Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-51595643755901610912012-09-02T10:00:00.000-07:002012-09-02T10:00:05.508-07:00The Law of Substitution<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv3bpHgaf8Ps1_P4fjCjqDsxAeFmh_vluzoUcGiGkaJU2Bj26XovHo9sqKe3gCd47IZXO1Ut-t0V_hin8zxL7jPB4ApGnwQ5SfBQZqDRP_YMTDGF_TrpM84-mYvcHakCYjZ52pPadENbk/s1600/gameoflife100.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv3bpHgaf8Ps1_P4fjCjqDsxAeFmh_vluzoUcGiGkaJU2Bj26XovHo9sqKe3gCd47IZXO1Ut-t0V_hin8zxL7jPB4ApGnwQ5SfBQZqDRP_YMTDGF_TrpM84-mYvcHakCYjZ52pPadENbk/s1600/gameoflife100.jpg" /></a></div>
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Is there something you desire to
receive? Maybe more than one
something? If so, you may find it easier
to receive if you know the law of substitution.
I first learned about this law from New Thought author Florence Scovel
Shinn in the <i>Game of Life and How to Play
It</i>, which she self-published in 1925.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Ms. Shinn tells the story of a woman
who was interested in having a certain man fall in love with her. The woman asked Ms. Shinn to treat (pray) for
this. The author agreed to pray for
divine selection, the man who was meant to be hers by divine right. If this particular man was intended to be her
partner, it would be so. The woman made
no progress with this gentleman, but did attract another with whom she fall in
love and experienced great happiness. As
Ms. Shinn explained, “This shows the law of substitution. A right idea was substituted for a wrong one,
therefore there was no loss or sacrifice involved.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Along these lines, many spiritual
teachers state that being specific in our prayers is fine, as long as we
add “this or something better” to our request.
This addition allows the law of substitution to take effect. If you’ve been stalled with your receiving,
don’t be afraid to consider the law of substitution. Remember that according to
Ms. Shinn, there is no loss or sacrifice when the right idea is substituted for
a wrong one.<o:p></o:p></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-61933413890551967562012-08-26T10:00:00.000-07:002012-08-26T10:00:05.608-07:00Finding Help<br />
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I’m working on my final speech to earn
my Advanced Communicator Bronze award at Toastmasters. It’s an after-dinner speech called “Do the
Impossible.” One of my tips for accomplishing
the impossible is to seek expert advice.
This suggestion also applies when we’re striving to receive something,
as often acquiring our goal can seem impossible.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Thankfully help is all around us. With care, you can locate good advice for
free on the Internet, for example. (Note
the qualifier - with care!) There are
also experts and coaches for everything imaginable. I have recently read two books by experts
that are great resources for people when they need help. The first is <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Working-Mommys-Manual-Nicole-Corning/dp/0615637418/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1345836412&sr=1-1&keywords=working+mommy%27s+manual" target="_blank">The Working Mommy’s Manual</a> </i>by Nicole Corning. Nicole speaks from her own experience and
offers a wide variety of ideas beginning with the pregnancy and continuing
through raising children and keeping peace with the in-laws. This is a terrific guide for mothers,
fathers, and bosses who have working parents on their staff.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The other book is by one of my favorite
authors, Steven Lane Taylor. If you want
to make life easier for yourself, read his book, <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Further-Down-Stream-Living-Divine/dp/0615611125/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1345836454&sr=1-1&keywords=further+down+the+stream%3A+101+tips" target="_blank">Further Down The Stream: 101 More Tips for Living Life in the DivineFlow</a>.</i> It’s like a box of chocolates that doesn’t go to your hips or raise
your blood cholesterol! <o:p></o:p></div>
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If you’re looking for more help, check
out the resources page of my website or email me. I’m blessed to know experts in many fields
that are sure to make it easier for you to receive with grace and ease.<o:p></o:p></div>
Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-48774718988771274122012-08-19T10:00:00.000-07:002012-08-19T10:00:03.814-07:00You Can Get There from Here<br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Learning to receive with grace and
ease involves many elements, as I mentioned last week. Another critical skill is being able to keep
moving forward when we don’t know the way.
If we’re alert, we can see the next step, but typically we can’t see
very far down the road, no matter how hard we look.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You may recall Jack Canfield’s
comments about this in the movie <i>The
Secret</i>. He advised us to think about the headlights on our car. We drive at night, sometimes only able to see
200 feet ahead of us. We just keep going
forward, with small sections of our path becoming clear as we progress. In the 2012 Summer Olympics you may have
heard a similar story told about Olympian Michael Phelps’ experience in the
2008 games where his goggles flooded during the first lap of one race. Soon he was unable to see anything! Being a champion, he continued to swim,
counting his strokes all the way to a medal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The lessons here are threefold: keep moving, use
what you know, and have faith. It’s
appropriate to stop and wait for guidance, provided we don’t get stuck. If fear is what keeps you from moving, it’s
probably time to get going again.
Remember what you know; for Phelps, it was how many strokes he took in
one lap. We almost always know more than
we realize. Finally, have faith that the
way will be made clear. You really can
get there from here.</span><br />Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-38111901454887903282012-08-12T10:00:00.000-07:002012-08-12T10:00:04.414-07:00The Stone Was Moved<br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To achieve the life we dream of, we
need to learn how to receive with grace and ease. This is a process involving numerous skills,
and one of those is the ability to keep making progress even when it seems like
we’re not capable of doing what we need to do.
We may lack the knowledge we need or maybe we don’t have the resources experts
say are required. This can leave us
paralyzed by confusion and fear. Perhaps
we’ve taken on more than we’re up for.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When I find myself holding these
thoughts, I love to remember the New Testament story from the gospel of Mark
where the women went to Jesus’ tomb to anoint his body. On the way there they worried about how they
would roll away the large stone that sealed the tomb. When they arrived, however, they found that
the stone was already moved and their way was clear! Furthermore they were told by an angel that
Jesus had gone on to Galilee ahead of them, just as he had promised.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The thing to keep in mind is that the women didn’t
let their concern prevent them from moving forward. They gathered their spices and went to tomb.
There they received exactly what they needed.
In addition, they were given the assurance that help and guidance were already in place, waiting to assist them as required. Let us keep moving in the direction of our
dreams, confident that the “stone” will be moved!</span>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-9645639170468457522012-08-05T10:00:00.000-07:002012-08-05T10:00:01.183-07:00Darkest Just Before the Dawn?<blockquote class="tr_bq">
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“When you get into a tight place and
everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a
minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the time and place that the
tide will turn.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Harriet Beecher Stowe, Novelist, 1811 - 1886</span></div>
</blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> <span style="text-indent: 0in;">Is it really darkest just before dawn?</span><span style="text-indent: 0in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: 0in;">I could not verify this, but it sure seems
that way when we need to receive.</span><span style="text-indent: 0in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: 0in;">Based
on the above quotation from Harriet Beecher Stowe, it appears she would have
agreed.</span><span style="text-indent: 0in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: 0in;">I love her expression of hope,
though!</span><span style="text-indent: 0in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: 0in;">In fact, my daughter gave me
this quotation years ago, and I’ve had it taped on my desk ever since.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Persistence is critical when we are
looking to receive. <a href="http://charlesfillmore.wwwhubs.com/">Charles Fillmore</a> thought
so. Consider the following words from
this co-founder of the Unity movement: “There are many persons who will to be
prosperous and who have made up their minds, as they think, very
determinedly. But they have not overcome
all doubts, and when their demonstration is delayed, as it is in such cases,
the doubt increases until they lose faith altogether. What they need is more persistence and
determination.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If this issue speaks to you, recommit
to claiming what you desire to receive-- an answer, a partner, greater
prosperity, a buyer for your home--whatever it may be. Make a list of the resources you have to help
you stay in belief. Include
inspirational reading and music, friends you could contact who will stand with
you, and your own list of previous experiences you’ve had receiving what you
needed. Finally, don’t forget to visit
my blog at <a href="http://artandscienceofreceiving.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">http://artandscienceofreceiving.blogspot.com/</a>
to see all my posts on learning to
receive with grace and ease.</span><o:p></o:p></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-86748603826525352762012-07-29T10:00:00.000-07:002012-07-29T10:00:05.797-07:00Foiled Attempts to Give<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjgR_rYMLZE2NPRQMFZiGHLDZEZbxXCrPi6jhQfdyt59DvWpqaAxRDta4n7vCc9ft94-Clu6yIQ-clTOK1ak3E1Xqmki5xDXCKMZjx-yz0PHbDZRkNg_hENFq24YgbwwTsOmKwfs1PAug/s1600/Hands+383x300.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjgR_rYMLZE2NPRQMFZiGHLDZEZbxXCrPi6jhQfdyt59DvWpqaAxRDta4n7vCc9ft94-Clu6yIQ-clTOK1ak3E1Xqmki5xDXCKMZjx-yz0PHbDZRkNg_hENFq24YgbwwTsOmKwfs1PAug/s320/Hands+383x300.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Most of us have heard the story about
the old man caught in a flood who, waiting for God to save him, died after he
turned down three different good Samaritans attempting to help him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve used that tale myself to illustrate the
importance of being open minded about how our good shows up when we need to
receive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Recently I thought about this story
from a different perspective, that of the would-be rescuers.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What if the tale were true?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can you imagine how the three kind souls
would have felt if they’d learned of the man’s demise?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have you ever attempted to give guidance,
feedback, or help only to have it rejected?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There may be a temptation to say “I told you so” or “I tried to warn you.”
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the other hand, you may feel guilty
or frustrated that your good intentions were not well received, particularly if it involved someone you truly
care for. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Having been in this position, I found it
took time for me to realize that I had nothing to resent or regret.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes after considerable angst, I came
to accept that I did all I could do and now needed yto let go and let God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Givers cannot be responsible for the receiver’s
actions or response.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Giving and
receiving is a process, and givers only have control over the giving part; the
receiving is up to the other party.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If
they’re not ready or willing to accept what is offered, it does not diminish
the giver’s efforts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Remember, this holds true with our
children, parents, subordinates, siblings, and friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Go easy on yourself; give from your heart and
let it go.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-48664012841772054732012-07-22T10:00:00.000-07:002012-07-22T10:00:04.430-07:00The Unexpected Good Stuff<b><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> Evelyn</span></span></b><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">: Nothing here has worked out quite as
I expected. <br />
<b>Muriel</b>: Most things don't. But sometimes what happens instead is the
good stuff.<o:p></o:p></span></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This bit of dialogue from the movie <em>The
</em><span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><em>Best Exotic Marigold Hotel</em> is one of my
favorite parts of the film.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Leave it to
Judi Dench (Evelyn) and Maggie Smith (Muriel) to come through for us again!)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It makes two very worthwhile points.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">First, most
things don’t work out the way we expect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve found that to be true in both directions: some things are better
than I thought they would be (remember the TV show Doogie Howser?) while others
don’t live up to my expectations (such as this fourth of July at the ballgame
when the D’backs lost and two guys next to us got into a fight and carried on
all through the fireworks).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s easy to
receive when things unexpectedly turn out well, but how well do you accept the
disappointments?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can you see the
blessings in those?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These might well be
the times Muriel is referring to as “the good stuff,” a second memorable
point from the film.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">To receive with grace and ease, we need to be ready
for anything and then be willing to receive it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My experience participating in an Arthritis Foundation marathon in
Amsterdam is an example of the proverbial silver lining in the cloud.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After I spent months training to race walk the
marathon, the event organizers were not prepared for walkers and began shutting
the course down after I had been walking only 90 minutes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To make a long story short, much to my
embarrassment and extreme disappointment, I never completed the marathon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What was the good stuff?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I ended up in excellent physical shape and
met my primary goals of raising $4500 and taking my daughters to Europe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In addition, I wasn’t sore the day after the
marathon like everyone else was, enabling me really enjoy my first time in
Europe!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The good stuff is there, if we’re
open to receiving it.</span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2mGSqll72RDPcWuLSXAbDuVUzJq8MXg0HtgTdUGiLLVeXzeQZfEkuME8AO2mi8YRUkG2WwL-iKM7bTRfuhUj7AIsMLf98WXLKGU4z8PWkKvIMuEOlZcOvegMH7ygMP_HIuA20iHW7rFA/s1600/Marathon+276x401.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2mGSqll72RDPcWuLSXAbDuVUzJq8MXg0HtgTdUGiLLVeXzeQZfEkuME8AO2mi8YRUkG2WwL-iKM7bTRfuhUj7AIsMLf98WXLKGU4z8PWkKvIMuEOlZcOvegMH7ygMP_HIuA20iHW7rFA/s320/Marathon+276x401.jpg" width="220" /></a></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-8065584599894210942012-07-15T10:00:00.000-07:002012-07-15T10:00:01.754-07:00How Well Do You Receive Praise?<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Many years ago I managed a
department of about 40 employees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
department had a major backlog when I was hired, and the company was hoping my
fresh perspective and human resources experience would help eliminate it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It took the work of everyone in the department
along with several others throughout the organization, a new understanding of
the work process, and about 15 months to get caught up - but we did it! <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">To celebrate, the team leaders and I
held a party which included food (of course!) and a gift and personal
recognition for each member of the department. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a private event held offsite during
which each person was asked to come forward to receive his or her gift.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All but one person happily came to the front
to receive their accolades and treasure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>One woman, a particularly strong performer who had been with us for many
years, refused to come up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After several
minutes of coaxing by the entire team, she finally, painfully came forward.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I had it to do over again, I would
handle it differently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I don’t
understand her refusal to be recognized, I learned that we cannot force people
to receive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She eventually took the gift
but the neither the givers nor the receiver felt the blessing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The team leaders and I were so determined to
show our appreciation, and she was equally adamant in her refusal to accept it,
although what her specific objection was I never did learn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The irony of it is that her unwillingness to
walk up, take the gift, and go back to her seat resulted in far more attention on
her than if she had just complied.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">People are so stressed and quick to find
fault today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let’s remember the joy of
giving praise, sweet music to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">almost</i>
everyone’s ears.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And when commendations
come our way, let’s receive them with grace and ease.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-50148609808336827092012-07-08T10:00:00.000-07:002012-07-08T10:00:04.040-07:00Nighttime<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What is your favorite time of
day?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mine is the morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For years I’ve had the habit of rising before
everyone else so I have the house to myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In the peace and quiet, I reflect, pray, read, journal, plan my day, and
sit in the silence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After exercising and
eating breakfast, I do my best work of the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve always been a morning person, so night people amaze me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I’m winding down, they’re just getting
started.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s really different for me.
<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Nighttime has a unique meaning spiritually
speaking, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we have a nighttime
experience in a spiritual sense it means we’ve gone as far as our own light
will take us at that point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just as we
wouldn’t move around our house in the dark, during our spiritual nighttime we’re
called to stop and wait for more light.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Wait for - not seek, strive or look for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No action is required on our part.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe the waiting and inactivity are why nighttime has never appealed to
me.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">When we’ve tried everything we know to
and still can’t see the next step before us, let’s recognize that it’s
nighttime.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let’s not be anxious, but
rather rest in the assurance that this quiet time is as necessary for our
growth as nighttime is for plants’ development.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s a time to rely less on our own personal efforts and more on Divine
Law that is always operating on our behalf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Let’s receive the time of respite and renewal free from concern, knowing
that all is well.</span></span></div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipTDdg7J8ikcGhc1X7aPeFXCm24MHsQ6r6g-xJghbfQNHkHrx0hWj7ZiJIEs74IglNAimZ6DX2RJAu2oZMQQxoyd_ZwdeRwC7jKxYnOPRGcNoxXeJUlW2_xX36Dd7uk7AwriH4qc6Jy8U/s1600/Night+Scene+341x256.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipTDdg7J8ikcGhc1X7aPeFXCm24MHsQ6r6g-xJghbfQNHkHrx0hWj7ZiJIEs74IglNAimZ6DX2RJAu2oZMQQxoyd_ZwdeRwC7jKxYnOPRGcNoxXeJUlW2_xX36Dd7uk7AwriH4qc6Jy8U/s320/Night+Scene+341x256.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-4657264156561941092012-07-01T10:00:00.000-07:002012-07-01T10:00:01.953-07:00Free to Give and Receive<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As I frequently point out, giving
typically bestows blessings on both the giver and the receiver.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These blessings are not automatic,
however.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An essential element which
allows the good to flow is that the giving and receiving be done freely.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">There may be times that based on the
situation, we feel obligated to give, to reciprocate for a gift or act of
kindness we received.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We may be subjected
to family expectations or feel pressured from our employer or a group to which
we belong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Similarly, we may be pressed
to accept something that we’d rather not receive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve had clients tell me stories about
someone they know who always insists on paying, for example.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Giving and receiving under these circumstances
is likely to restrict the flow of good to both parties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I encourage you to avoid it.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 6pt 0in 0pt; tab-stops: 128.0pt; text-indent: 0in;">
<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My favorite Shakespearean quotation
applies here, “This above all: to thine ownself be true.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When faced with a giving or receiving
opportunity that causes you to resist, stop and examine where the resistance is
coming from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is there a history of
one-sided giving that you resent?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does
the giver tend to hold the gift against you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Do you fear feeling obligated to that particular giver?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If so, can you have an authentic conversation
that would allow you to proceed comfortably? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For the process to work, both giving and
receiving need to occur freely, with grace and ease.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518466192388201300.post-58081724687422782872012-06-24T10:00:00.000-07:002012-06-24T10:00:04.912-07:00Show Up to Receive with Grace and Ease<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Showing up helps us become skillful
receivers, too. To receive what we need or desire, we’ve got to be in the game;
we’ve got to show up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What exactly does
that look like?<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<br />
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">There are many ways we can show up and
put ourselves in a position to receive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We can literally say “yes” to invitations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most of the time, when I think I’m attending
an event to help the organizer out, I am the one to be blessed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To show up could mean responding to email,
returning a phone call, volunteering for a project, joining a committee at
church, or taking on an officer role in one of the groups to which we
belong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can show up in a conversation
by listening intently, noticing the other person’s body language, tone of
voice, and facial expressions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we
eat, we can show up by focusing on the food one bite at a time, noting its
appearance, aroma, texture, and flavors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Perhaps the most significant way to
show up is to stay in the present moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This requires an ongoing effort on my part, I’ve found.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we’re dwelling on the past or worrying
about the future, we overlook the gifts of current moment: the beauty of our
surroundings; the sounds that fill the air, be they birds singing, waves on the
shore, or a favorite song playing; the smile from a stranger; or a door held
open.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Showing up is what receiving with
grace and ease is all about.</span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD0ESUQXkpCgO5VD6LbaW-i0mPYBFXqUe6EDX7RAZBHHdl7VUB-EyzolZznp9ugure3uKeWEvPMQcRItuOtTMjME8ah5GkxYN5MiV3hCVUhpEvYD3IulrG-9FyH6_ncaK9o5WxaoE5UaM/s1600/Wave.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD0ESUQXkpCgO5VD6LbaW-i0mPYBFXqUe6EDX7RAZBHHdl7VUB-EyzolZznp9ugure3uKeWEvPMQcRItuOtTMjME8ah5GkxYN5MiV3hCVUhpEvYD3IulrG-9FyH6_ncaK9o5WxaoE5UaM/s320/Wave.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Joanne Deckhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10032277088269213706noreply@blogger.com0