This blog is intended to create a dialogue about learning to receive with grace and ease.

So much has been written about the importance of giving that we forget that in order to give,

someone has to be receiving.





Sunday, February 26, 2012

The Many Forms of Receiving

One of my favorite prosperity teachers is the Rev. Edwene Gaines. She has made a 100% commitment to the transformation of the abundance consciousness of the world. A question she likes to ask people is this: Would you be willing to consider the possibility that God has ways of blessing you that you don’t already know about? Isn’t that a great question? So often when I think about receiving I get stuck on how I think it will show up. But God, being infinite, has an infinite number of ways to bring my good to me.

I recently heard a great example of a seemingly unthinkable way someone was blessed. A major hotel in Phoenix had booked a wedding for a local couple. After the date was confirmed, a large group approached the hotel about booking an event the same weekend. To hold accommodate the group, the entire hotel would be needed. The revenue from this group would far exceed that of the wedding, so the hotel arranged to move the wedding to the beautiful Wrigley Mansion, completely at the hotel’s expense. Can you imagine having your entire wedding paid for and held at the Wrigley Mansion? Do you think this was a possibility the couple ever considered?

To be a skillful receiver, it’s important to remember that we can receive in an infinite number of ways. It’s fine to visualize something good, but be sure to be open to something different and even better. Let’s receive with grace and ease every good thing the Universe has for us.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Are You Ready to Receive?

When you think about receiving, does it seem like a no-brainer? Of course I’m ready to receive! Who wouldn’t want to receive? It sure seemed that way to me…until I started really thinking about it, especially when things don’t show up the way I expect them to. It’s easy to imagine gratefully receiving a four-day weekend trip to San Diego. But what about when the planned two-night trip turns into a four-night stay due to car trouble? I found that it was not very easy to receive the extra two-days exploring San Diego. Worry about missing work, getting coverage for my Jazzercise class, and paying for the car repairs crowded out my enjoyment of the good things that came. I was stuck there, one way or another, so why not enjoy it? Thankfully my husband, Roger, is a skillful receiver who really lives life to the fullest. He filled our time with wonderful adventures, and I ended up receiving much more than I would have managed to on my own.

It isn’t just vacations that trigger these anxious feelings of worry and guilt. I remember feeling the same way when Roger and I were given tickets to a great show at the last minute, so I had to quit work a bit earlier that day than I had planned. It might be the unexpected call from an out-of-town friend who can only see you that day or the networking event that would take you away from the office, but give you the social interaction you’ve been craving.

I encourage you to be aware when you feel constricted and anxious about the opportunity to receive. Just recognizing your reaction can help you identify its source, allowing you move past the feelings and truly open yourself to receiving all that the universe has for you.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

My VA Job – A Parking Lot Success Story

Last week, I wrote about using the idea of a parking lot to place thoughts or needs that we have but can’t do anything about at the moment. I had a wonderful experience with this practice and how a need was met easily in a way that amazed me.

When I was in college, it was a struggle each year to find a summer job. The summer I was 20, I got a temporary child care position that was scheduled to last only two weeks. At the start of the second week when nothing else was showing up, I remember placing the matter in God’s hands, the ultimate parking lot! I had applied everywhere I knew to, and so I told God that we both knew if I didn’t have a job that summer, I couldn’t go back to school in the fall. Then I let it go. Two days later I got a call from the manager of the Veterans Administration Outpatient Clinic in Rochester. He found my name on a list and had an opening for a clerk-typist. I had completely forgotten that I took a civil service test for summer jobs the previous winter!

The next day I went in for the interview. The manager, Joe, asked me if I could type. I said “yes,” and he replied, “You’ve got the job!” It was that easy. And the job paid three times what I had made the year before at a fast food restaurant! In addition, I worked in a nice office during the day, M – F, a far cry from working the nasty fryers six days a week the previous summer. Joe and the others were terrific to work for, and Joe ended up coming to my wedding a couple years later.

Keep the parking lot in mind. It beats stewing over something you can’t change, and it may just be the answer you’re seeking.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

The Parking Lot

Most people think of cars when they hear the phrase “parking lot.” As a trainer, the phrase has an additional meaning. During a workshop, when participants bring up a relevant issue that we cannot address at that moment, I put the item in the parking lot. I label a flip chart page “Parking Lot” and post the item there, so it won’t be forgotten. This way the group can let the issue go for the time being, and I don’t forget to follow up on it later.

There are times when it would be helpful to carry this practice into our personal lives. When you have an idea you don’t want to forget, but can’t act on right away, start a parking lot list and note it there. Just as parking lots have specified sections such as valet or handicapped, you can label parts of the page by topic, such as home or family.

We can also use this technique when we become aware of a need that we don’t know how to meet. If there isn’t an action you can take in the moment, don’t worry or stew about it. Place the need in the parking lot. This lets you and the Universe know it’s important, but can’t be handled right now. Then turn your attention to an affirmation such as “All my needs are met in a perfect way at the right time.” Take a moment and remember a time when a need was met and recall how good that felt. Then get back to the business at hand. The item in the parking lot will be there, ready for attention when the time is right.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Letting Go of Judgment

Following up on last week’s theme of attracting good, one way to draw into our lives more of what we need and desire is to minimize judgment. Ideally it would be best if we could eliminate it altogether, but I’ve not met anyone who’s done that, although there may well be a few who have. When I say eliminate judgment, I don’t mean finding whatever anyone does as acceptable, because clearly some things are not. I’m referring to finding the behavior unacceptable rather than the person.

The first step is to recognize when we’re into judgment. When I find myself judging another, I remind myself that I don’t know the whole story. I have no idea of that person’s history, upbringing, environment, mental state, or other factors that influence behavior. Take physical condition, for instance. Chronic pain can deeply affect someone’s thinking, attitude and behavior. If I’m not careful, I can take for granted the amazing parents I was gifted with and forget that everyone did not have the benefit of such effective, loving parenting.

One way I turn my thoughts around is to visualize a group of people who love me assembled together, smiling broadly as if for a photo. I place the person I’ve been judging in the center of the group, surrounded by all that love and goodwill. I see the individual smiling, too, even if I’ve never actually seen the person smile. This usually does the trick and I find myself able to let go of the negativity I’d been holding. I invite you to give this a try the next time you’re encountering someone whose actions you find questionable. It’s not only effective, but fun!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Attracting Our Good

Have you ever noticed that there are some people you just love to be around? I remember years ago working with a man named Jason who made me feel like a million bucks whenever I saw him. I looked forward to our brief conversations because I always felt so good about myself afterward. Other people are so bright and light-hearted that we feel good about life after just a few moments in their presence.

Scientists are now proving what many spiritual teachers have been saying for years: we are powerful magnets that draw to ourselves what we send out. Whether consciously or not, the people I’m describing are magnets for good. They see the good in life and in other people, attracting more of the same to themselves. It’s true that misery loves company, so folks who dwell on the negative are repelled by these magnets of good.

What would you like to attract – greater health, improved relationships, new clients? All of these things and more will be drawn to you as you become the kind of person others want to be with. Gratitude and compassion are simple, but powerful mood shifters, and the place to start is with you. Be thankful for what you are rather than what you have, and let go of self-judgment. Others will sense your kindheartedness and be drawn to you. As you attract like-minded people, staying in this positive space will be easier and become a habit. I’m all for life getting easier, how about you?

Sunday, January 15, 2012

We Cannot Give What We Have Not Received


Many people tell me that they prefer giving over receiving. I wonder if they’ve ever considered where they got what they have to give. It’s common sense to recognize that we can only give what we have in the first place, and what we have we received from somewhere.

If we have money to give, we received it from some entity. Yes, we may well have worked for it, exchanging our labor for pay. But first someone had to give us a chance and employ us. They believed in us enough to hire us, and we received their offer. If we have food, clothing, or household goods to give, we received those just as we did the money. It could be that we were given them, but even if we originally purchased them, we still had to have received the money, as I pointed out.

What about our most valuable gifts: our time, our love, our attention and support? How is it that we have those to give? We have the ability and willingness to give the highest and best of ourselves because someone first extended those things to us. For most people, it began with their parents, and of course believers will tell you God is the ultimate source of these things.

If giving has become a chore for you, it could be that your storehouse is running low. Those familiar with the New Testament know that even Jesus, the consummate giver, frequently went away alone to “refuel” himself, receiving rest, guidance, and peace. What is it you need to receive? Don’t be afraid to seek it, because you cannot give what have not received.