So how’s it going for you so far? Have you gotten any unexpected gifts? What does it feel like to receive a gift from someone who wasn’t on your shopping list? For most people, it’s not comfortable. The idea of reciprocating is so engrained in us that receiving without giving in return is almost unbearable for some people. I remember an episode of Fraser where Martin (Fraser’s father) and Daphne, his caregiver, struggled with this very thing. They ended up having quite a row, as Daphne would put it.
I find it helpful to put myself in the other person’s shoes. How would I feel if I gave a present to someone who did not give one to me? Most likely, I’d be fine with it. After all, why did I give the gift? Because I wanted to, not to get one in return or because I thought I had to. It could be that I saw something I thought they would enjoy, or perhaps I felt especially thankful for their friendship and wanted to express it with something tangible. Whatever the reason, remember that in the vast majority of cases, the giver gives simply for the joy of giving. Your gratitude and appreciation are the gifts the giver hoped to receive, nothing more. If you feel compelled to give something in return, how about a hand-written thank you note? In this day of email and text messages, it will not only be cherished but also unique!
Let’s remember this holiday season that our greatest gifts to one another are gratitude and appreciation.
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